Several years ago, Lloyd Reeb, a friend, coach and primary spokesman for the Halftime Institute, introduced me to an exercise designed to help me develop the start of a personal mission statement. Here’s the scenario he proposed. Imagine it’s your 80th birthday. Your spouse or a friend planned a quiet evening at your favorite restaurant. When you arrive, you are surprised to see the whole restaurant is reserved for you. Your closest family, friends and colleagues are all there. And now the fun begins. There’s a microphone in front of the room.
The heart of the envisioning exercise is wrapped around three open-ended statements. The surprise birthday guests at your party have been asked to speak about three things. And those three statements are to be about you and your life:
1 – Here’s what I admire most about you…
2 – Here’s the difference you made in my life…
3 – Your #1 lifetime achievement of significance is…
When I responded to that exercise a few years ago, I wrote down three statements I envisioned: 1) He loved God and people. 2) He introduced me to a meaningful and personal relationship with God. And 3) he created a movement much larger than himself.
I reflected on that visualizing practice this week as I was celebrating my 61st birthday. Receiving over 600 birthday greetings through various social media platforms, I noticed something as I read each of them. Of course, some were a quick “Happy Birthday, Dennis.” But quite a few included statements about my impact and influence on them. And guess what? I noticed all three of the above wishes I had for my 80th birthday included in the birthday greeting comments. I was amazed. Moved. Humbled. Gratified. Inspired. And blessed. I don’t have to wait two more decades to find out my legacy.
That 80th birthday imagination accomplished its purpose. It helped me develop a personal mission statement and to be very intentional about living on mission over the years. I’m seeing the fruit. I’m getting the rewards already. I’m thankful.
How about you? What would you want to hear from your family, friends and peers on these three issues? You can’t build an intentional plan for the future if you don’t have a vision of what you want it to look like. This exercise will help you envision a second half or a third third of life that you consider meaningful and satisfying. I know because I’ve done it.
Question: What do you want said about you in those three areas? I’d love to hear at least one of them in the comment section below. Thanks!
I was recently watching a segment of The Voice, a made-for-TV vocal competition in its seventh season. One of the musician coaches, Pharrel Williams, gave memorable counsel to a young artist. Williams said, “Don’t sing anyone else’s story, sing your own.” I jotted that one down.
Irish writer and poet, Oscar Wilde, is known for this great line, “Be yourself; everyone is already taken.” It’s the same concept. Sing your own story. Be yourself. You are one of a kind. You are unique.
I’m grateful for parents who taught me to be proud of who I am. I’m sure I too was tempted during my adolescent transitions to blend in with the crowd and to be more like my peers than different. But yet, I have lots of memories of choosing clothes and shoes that were unique, bright and stood out from the rest of those on the shelf. I was always a bit miffed and embarrassed if I saw one of my peers with the exact same shirt or shoes.
Even as an adult, when purchasing a new Honda Civic several years ago, I ordered it with several moderately-priced exterior options so it would stand out from the crowd. And to this day, even having driven it across North America on a 14,000 mile road trip during our recent sabbatical, I’ve never seen another Civic just like mine. I like that. I don’t want to sing someone else’s story. I want to be one of a kind. It’s just who I’ve become. It’s what I value. And yes, I even like my car to be exclusive.
Are you an innovator or an imitator? Our world is filled with copycats and counterfeits. What we really need more of is innovative standouts– distinctive, irreplaceable and rare. The Message paraphrase of the Hebrew Psalm gives us this poetic picture of gratitude for God’s intention for each of us:
Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day. (Psalm 139:13-16)
One of my favorite verses in the Bible is, “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago” (Ephesians 2:10). Yes, you really are a masterpiece. The original language uses the word “poiema.” In English, we say poem. Did you realize that you are a set-apart and carefully crafted poem of God that expresses His heart? Yes. You are a masterwork. An original. No one else has a fingerprint just like yours.
Only you can do and be exactly what God has designed you to be and do. Innovate today. Sing your own story. Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.
QUESTION: What helps you to remember to be unique? I’d love to hear it below in the comment section.
I like to let you know the summary of the top five posts that people read and shared with others! In case you missed reading them, here they are for November:
1. Gratitude Unlocks the Fullness of Life
3. Five Regrets
4. Early Celebration Can Cost You
5. Leverage Gathering Launch (this gathering happens every Sunday morning – see video)
Also, I’m so honored when you use the share feature at the top and bottom of each post. When you find something that has been thought-provoking and helpful for you, I appreciate it so much when you share it with others. It helps immensely to get the word out to those who may have not had a previous chance to see it. So, thanks so much!
QUESTION: Which of the recent posts were most helpful to you? Share it with our readers in the comment section below. Thank you!
This is a crazy conflicting week! Today, I am walking with a family through arguably the most horrific thing any human can experience—the death of their 5 year-old son in a traffic accident caused by the reckless decision of another driver. From leading a funeral for a kindergarten student in the morning to welcoming my out-of-town 16 month-old twin grandchildren as Thanksgiving guests in our home later in the evening. You can’t find any more polar opposite emotions.
Our granddaughter Analise with spontaneous praise while watching the sunset on the Oregon Coast.
Melody Beattie wrote, “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more.” She added, “It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.” Excellent thoughts to reflect on this during this week of Thanksgiving. Gratitude really does unlock the fullness of life. Even when you have been devastated by the death of your five year-old son.
As I sat with these grieving parents the other day to plan for little Nathan’s funeral, I asked them to share words that best described their beloved son. They smiled. They cried. They laughed and wept as they portrayed the unique personality and character of their boy through words and phrases. They expressed gratitude in so many different ways. They were grateful for a memorable family vacation in Tennessee – Nathan got to see snow for the first time, hiked in the Fall foliage, saw bears in the wild, and so much more. The tragic crash happened on their return to Florida.
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. Because this grief-stricken family is filled with gratitude for the few years and rich experiences they did have with their son, they can fully live. They feel the depth and stretch of emotions. Love. Sadness. Gratitude. Anger. Sorrow. Fear. Appreciation.
For more of Dennis’ nature photography, go to www.GingerichPhotoArt.com
If we are missing gratitude in our lives, we will be limited to only a few emotions—the cortisol-releasing kind that destroy us from the inside out. If we choose gratitude, the many feel-good hormones (serotonin, dopamine, endorphins, oxytocin, etc.) will infiltrate our bodies and move us toward wellness and wholeness.
The longer I live, the more I’m convinced that gratitude is the answer to almost every problem we face. Think about it. Gratitude can transform anxiety, anger, discontent, grief, greed and depression. Gratitude may not change your circumstance, but it can change you and me. However, when gratitude transforms us, it may possibly change our circumstance. I love what a Benedictine monk, Brother David Steindl-Rast said, “You think this is just another day. It’s not just another day. It’s the one day that is given to you today…It’s the only gift that you have right now. And the only appropriate response is gratefulness.”
We want our lives to be filled with the overflowing cornucopia of gratitude—appreciation, gentleness, love, kindness, peace, purpose, abundance, beauty and joy. How do I get there? Here’s what I’m learning. I make a daily decision to live in gratitude. I receive God’s grace on a daily basis. I choose to appreciate the gifts that come into my life each day—even the challenges that help me to grow. So today, I will seek to live with intentional focus in the moments God gives me. Leading a funeral for a five year old or kissing my toddling twin grandbabies at the door. I will fully engage my heart with gratitude.
So this Thanksgiving week, and every week, make it a practice to see the opportunity in the crisis, the blessing in the disappointment, and the joy when it goes just like you want it to. When you do, gratitude will, indeed, become a way of living. Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
QUESTION: What is one area of your life where you will choose gratitude this week? Please share it in the comment section below. Thank you!
This week, the 25th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall was celebrated across Germany and beyond. Construction of the Berlin Wall, which cut the city in two, began August 1961 to stop the fleeing of nearly 1000 people a day from Communist-controlled East Germany to the democracy of West Germany.
Earlier this year, while on sabbatical, my wife Linda and I spent nearly three weeks in Germany. One week of our travels was based in Berlin. One of those days we toured the area of the former wall. It was quite moving to visit. A city divided for 28 years. A wall 96 miles in length. Only 13 feet tall. 136 died at the wall. Sobering. Impactful.
I wrote in my journal at the end of our visit to the wall on May 30, 2014, “A reminder once again of evil men and their capacity to inflict suffering on others. Horrible suffering of the people. Lavish living by the leaders. Powerful to see how a small wall could lead to such a huge barrier for so long.”
I found it interesting this week to read and hear conversations about President John F. Kennedy’s famous “Ich bin ein Berliner” speech near the wall just shortly before his death in 1963. Other’s wrote about the famous speech of President Ronald Regan 24 years later at the Brandenberg Gate as he thundered, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall.” Some have spoken about concerts on the west side of the wall but overheard on the east side by rock and roll greats such as David Bowie and Bruce Springsteen. Still others have pointed to the roles of world leaders like Pope John Paul II and Margret Thatcher. All likely had at least a small influence.
However, during our visit to the former Berlin Wall, I found it most intriguing to learn of a Monday night prayer meeting at St. Nicholas Church in the East German city of Leipzig. This weekly Prayer for Peace started in 1982, a full seven years before the wall crumbled. A recent BBC article outlines all the details (see “Did a prayer meeting really bring down the Berlin Wall and end the Cold War?”). Pastor Christian Fuhrer opened the doors of his church to all people—Christians, atheists, young, old, anyone. A month before the fall of the wall, the momentum built to 8,000 gathering at St. Nicholas for prayer. Other churches in Leipzig held the overflow until an estimated 70,000 people amassed for prayer followed by a peaceful march through the city. This groundswell of non-violent ordinary East Germans astounded the heavily armed and helmeted riot police. They didn’t engage. Later the East German officials admitted “we were ready for anything, except candles and prayer.”
Commonplace, typical, East Germans motivated by prayer and peace with a desire for freedom, were the tipping point–spilling energy into the people of Dresden and Berlin over the next weeks. Peaceful demonstrations grew to 120,000, 300,000 and more until November 9, 1989 when an estimated one million Germans flooded the streets and start chipping away at the wall—the world watching on live television.
Peaceful people praying. They make a difference. They really do. Just maybe, more of a difference than all the most powerful politicians in the world. That thought, makes me want to practice the three thousand year-old words spoken by God himself, “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” (2 Chronicles 7:14).
To All Email Subscribers
I apologize that the video link in the previously sent email version of the “Leverage Gathering Launch” blog post did not work. Here’s the link: VIDEO. — Dennis
Great news for the 50 and better crowd in southwest Florida! I’m launching something new. Check out this video:
I’m very passionate about helping folks leverage their years of wisdom and God-given resources to make the world a better place. This season of life has proven to be the most productive years for many people. By the time people reach the second half with all of their wisdom and life experiences, they should be ready to start making a difference in their world. Sometimes they just need some inspiration and a little guidance to get started. I will do my best to inspire and share practical help as you intentionally focus your mission toward living with significance.
When and Where: Starting Sunday, November 16, I will be hosting and leading the weekly Leverage Gathering at 7:45 AM until 8:30 AM in the Student Ministry auditorium at Cape Christian, 2110 Chiquita Blvd. S., in Cape Coral, FL.
What to Expect: There will be coffee and refreshments awaiting you from 7:45 until 8am. Meet some new friends, connect with current friends. I will then provide 15-20 minutes of input and then there will be an additional 10-15 minutes of discussion and application. At least once a month, there will be a testimonial of someone who has found significance through leveraging their time, talent and treasure for a higher purpose.
So here are sample topics for our times together: What Makes Your Heart Sing?, The Two Most Important Days of Your Life, Know Your Mission, Dealing with Unrealized Dreams, Intentional Grand-parenting, Success to Significance, Facing Mid-life Challenges, Parenting Adult Children with Purpose, Leveraging Your Influence, Wisdom for Maximum Impact, Leaving an Intentional Legacy, Finishing Well, Making the Second Half the Best Half, Marriages that Keep Growing, Fruit-filled Retirement, The Best is Yet to Come, Living the Dash, Personal Board of Directors, A Family on Mission, Leaders That Last, Developing Life-Giving Relationships, Do Something Grand, Rearview Mirror Living and much more.
If you have any questions, shoot me an email at DGingerich@capechristian.com and I’ll be happy to try to answer them. If you are local, invite a friend and join me this coming Sunday. Please feel free to share this with your friends via email or social media. Thanks!
Recently, I wrote about a local football hero who made it to the NFL and got featured on every sport’s network top-five highlight reel with his embarrassing pre-touchdown pat-himself-on-the-back blunder. His hand-in-the-air celebration as he coasted toward the goal line ended with a thud at the 5-yard line—brought down by a hard-charging but unseen tackler. The high-potential rookie, Sammy Watkins, had celebrated his 84-yard touchdown run a bit premature.
Way too often, we’ve observed companies, politicians, business leaders, spiritual leaders, and civic leaders grow from good to great and then stumble, derail or decline. Two best-selling books targeting this phenomenon in business circles, How the Mighty Fall by Jim Collins and Derailed by Tim Irwin, have highlighted the predictable patterns and causes. Jim Collins‘ research reveals five stages of decline for companies that have had great success: 1) Hubris born of success, 2) Undisciplined pursuit of more, 3) Denial of risk and peril, 4) Grasping for salvation and 5) Capitulation to irrelevance or death. Dr. Tim Irwin describes the stages of derailment as a process: 1) Failure of self/other awareness, 2) Hubris: Pride before the fall, 3) Missed early warning signals, 4) Rationalizing and 5) Derailment.
Here’s my own take on how to avoid a fall before reaching the goal line:
More photos by Dennis @ www.GingerichPhotoArt.com
Stay Humble – If I view my success as “deserved” and see myself as the epicenter of my organization’s success, I’m primed for a tumble. Arrogance and entitlement are like running on shifting sand on the way to the finish line. If I lose my inquisitive and learning orientation, I’m implying I know it all. There are many more nuances of hubris described by both Collins and Irwin. But here’s what King Solomon tweeted nearly three thousand years ago, “First pride, then the crash—the bigger the ego, the harder the fall. (Proverbs 16:18, The Message).
Be Aware of Your Surroundings – Success has a way of creating tunnel vision. Sammy Watkins was so focused on the fact he made the catch and had run 84 yards that he simply failed to notice Saalim Haikim in his rearview mirror. If I as a leader get enthralled with my organization’s success, I can easily miss the warning lights and gauges that could signal an impending problem. Collins book reminds me that I must stay focused on the primary “flywheel” that got the organization to greatness in the first place. Apostle Paul wrote, “Don’t be so naive and self-confident. You’re not exempt. You could fall flat on your face as easily as anyone else. Forget about self-confidence; it’s useless. Cultivate God-confidence.” (1 Corinthians 10:12, The Message).
Keep Running Strong—Coasting has cost a lot of athletes the gold medal. Even the focus of an upcoming retirement date can create a mindset of aimlessly wandering toward the finish line. I’m committed to running strong all the way to the end. I am working toward mastering the fine art of finishing well. (See Philippians 3:12-14).
Know Your Mission—A brief forgetful moment that the mission of the game is to score goals, cost Sammy Watkins. Catching the pass was spectacular. Running down the field toward the goal was awesome. But neither of those count on the scoreboard. The ball has to cross the goal line. Do you know your mission? Do you have an updated mission statement that will carry you all the way to the end zone?
Pursue Accountability—I have a personal board of directors. They help me stay focused on my mission and remind me who I am. I need my wife and others to make me aware of an increasing ego, shortcut tendencies or if I’m drifting off mission.
Know Your Highest Calling—Our Creator has designed us to desire, need and thrive in relationship to Him. If I’m missing a clear sense of purpose in relation to God’s biggest picture for me, then I will always be shortsighted. I’ll never be fulfilled and satisfied with any level of earthly or material success. I’ll always be chasing the unreachable wind (See Ecclesiastes 2:1-11).
However, I’ve been learning this. When I stay in daily close connection with God and understand His calling and purpose for me, then it’s definitely easier to avoid arrogance, to be attuned to my surroundings, to run convincingly to the goal, to know my personal mission and to humbly seek accountability.
QUESTION: What would you add? I’d love to hear it in the comment section.
Last weekend the most embarrassing thing happened to our local make-it-big hometown football hero. He’s been making the sports highlight reels this week—all for the wrong reasons. The fourth-overall NFL pick made a big-time rookie mistake. Buffalo Bills wide receiver Sammy Watkins was stopped short of a touchdown on an 84-yard catch in the second quarter of a game with the New York Jets. Watkins, a top shelf athlete who grew up and played in Southwest Florida where I live, thought he had a free pass to a touchdown. So he raised his arm in celebration as he neared the end zone, only to be surprised by a tackle at the 5-yard line. Whoops! Embarrassment extraordinaire! (Here’s the video link).
Celebrating before reaching the goal line can cost you. Sammy Watkins’ pursuer, Saalim Haikim, was running hard the entire way, and he was the hero for his team. Watkins started coasting at the end of his phenomenal run and he will be the example coaches will use to teach their players what NOT to do for many years in the future.
My friend, Dr. Henry Oursler of TightRope Communications, did a study of leaders in the Bible. He found the Bible mentions 2,390 people by name. Approximately 1,000 of the named people were men and women we would refer to as leaders. But we only have significant information to get a full picture on 100 of those leaders. Of those 100, only one-third of them finished their lives well. Most of those that didn’t finish well, failed in the last half of their life. How sobering is that?
I personally know of too many of my own peers who have made a Sammy Watkins style blunder—start coasting, pride-fully celebrating their successes, unaware of the danger nearby and they get tripped up at the five-yard line. They too get embarrassed, head down in shame as their failures are paraded before the world to see. We’ve all seen them in the headlines. And the cost is much more than one touchdown in one game of their career. Often, the entire positive legacy of a seasoned second-halfer is erased by a near-the-goal-line catastrophe.
So how do we avoid these kind of costly mistakes? My next blog post will lay it out in more detail. But the key elements are humility, pay attention to your surroundings, run strong to the finish line, know your mission, remain accountable and press on toward the goal of the high calling of God himself (see Philippians 3:12-14).
QUESTION: What additional things should I include in my next blog as a way to avoid being taken-down just short of the goal line? I’d love to hear from you in the comment section below. Thanks!
About six months ago, I read a short article by Bronnie Ware. She summed up her book, “The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.” Here’s how it started. After leaving an unfulfilling job, Bronnie worked in hospice care. She informally compiled a list of the five most common regrets expressed by the people she cared for. She wrote an article, a blog and then a book.
Triple Falls in Glacier National Park, MT www.GingerichPhotoArt.com
I totally resonate with Bronnie’s discovery. As a pastor for the last 35 years, many have confided in me their regrets near the end of their earthly journeys. In fact, I intentionally ask, “How would you live your life differently if you could do it all over again?” The responses I’ve heard have helped shape and sharpen my own journey.
The list Ms. Ware collected gained huge popularity, and I’m sharing it with you because it’s something all of us should keep in mind. Even though it can be hard to think about, this stuff is really important for your life right here and now!
1. “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” – So many dreams have gone unfulfilled because too many people live out everyone else’s expectations and suppress or ignore their own. Do you have a clear mission statement? Are you intentionally living out your mission and purpose? If not, what needs to change?
2. “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” – Ware stated, “This came from every male patient I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship.” It can happen to women too. But reflect for a moment. If you keep the current pace you are on right now, will you have any regrets about how you used your time?
Many Lake in Glacier National Park, MT www.GingerichPhotoArt.com
3. “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” – So many people live in mediocre relationships because they never get beyond the 90% level of conversations that are “safe.” Most us have trouble expressing the final 10% which expresses how we really feel. A lot of health issues are a result of bitterness and resentment that folks have carried for years and years. Talk to a friend, your clergy, or a counselor and share the final 10% and also learn how to healthily and regularly go beyond the 90% in your significant relationships.
4. “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.” – We can easily become so busy doing life that we let our life-giving relationships slip away over the years. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. Staying connected to long-time friends or developing new friends is important all along life’s timeline. Life happens. Time keeps going. How are you being intentional about nurturing your relational connections?
5. “I wish that I had let myself be happier.” – Many of us fail to realize until near the end that happiness is actually a choice. If not intentional, we will stay stuck in old patterns and habits that are comforting and familiar. And our fear of change can easily keep us from fully enjoying life. We just go along with the flow and never find the happiness, joy and fulfillment that God wants all of us to have. Changes in our emotional, physical, relational or spiritual patterns are a few key places to examine first if you aren’t experiencing regret-free living that is filled with an abundant measure of joy.
Think about it. This is really powerful advice. Take it from the people that have been there, and don’t make the same mistake! And just maybe I can inspire you today to adjust some areas before it turns into a regret. Have a regret-free day!
QUESTION: From your experience, which one of these five should be at the top of the list? What else would you add to the list? Please share it in the comment area below. Thanks!
